{"id":638,"date":"2024-12-11T01:01:00","date_gmt":"2024-12-11T01:01:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.xn--advnx-ira.de\/wp\/?p=638"},"modified":"2024-12-21T13:05:23","modified_gmt":"2024-12-21T13:05:23","slug":"11-dezember-kontrollgrenzen","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.xn--advnx-ira.de\/wp\/?p=638","title":{"rendered":"11. Dezember &#8211; KONTROLLGRENZEN"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Stress<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Fuck<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Es gibt ein Datum<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ein Datum, das alles oder nichts bedeuten kann<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">ein Datum, das mich extrem knechtet<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">abzuliefern, <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">alles mir erm\u00f6gliche reinzustecken<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">um die Anforderungen zu erf\u00fcllen.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Die T\u00fccke:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">nicht alle Faktoren sind kontrollierbar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Unwissenheit und das Handeln von anderen Menschen zwingen mich in eine Art Abh\u00e4ngigkeit<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Abh\u00e4ngigkeit von einem unkontrollierbarem Schicksal.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Doch das Datum b\u00e4umt sich in meinem Geist auf<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">schie\u00dft Giftpfeile der Rastlosigkeit und Nervosit\u00e4t auf mich ab<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">und zwingt mich in ein \u00dcberlebenskampfmodus.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ich gebe mein Bestes<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">aber ist es genug?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Und ist es wirklich mein Bestes?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Oder h\u00e4tte ich noch mehr liefer k\u00f6nnen, wenn&#8230;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Das Datum br\u00fcllt<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">unweigerlich<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">unbes\u00e4nftbar <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">in meinem Kopf<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">und l\u00e4sst mich nicht zur Ruhe kommen.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Alkohol!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">schreit mein Geist<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">auf der Suche nach ein paar ruhigen Stunden<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Essen!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">schreit mein K\u00f6rper<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">auf der Suche nach ausreichend Energie um den Tag zu \u00fcberstehen<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Endorphine! <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">schreit meine Seele<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">ausgezehrt von zu viel von allem, um mich herum.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Doch das Datum<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">ist da<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">unweigerlich<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">schreitet es n\u00e4her<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Tag f\u00fcr Tag <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Stunde um Stunde<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">ich bin wie gel\u00e4hmt <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">und genau dieses Gef\u00fchl<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">hilflos ausgeliefert zu sein<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">unwirksam<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">faul<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">peinigt mich <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">und l\u00e4sst mich mich selbst bestrafen<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">f\u00fcr etwas, was ich eben nicht getan habe.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Unwissenheit, Unverm\u00f6gen, Unwirksamkeit<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">sind heute meine gr\u00f6\u00dften Feinde<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">die es zu bezwingen gilt<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">ehe ich diesem verdammten Datum<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">dass sich tief in mein Ged\u00e4chtnis gebohrt hat<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">aufger\u00fcstet entgegentreten kann.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Was ungekl\u00e4rt bleibt<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">bis zum Schluss<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">&#8230;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">ist das F\u00fcnkchen Gl\u00fcck <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">das es ben\u00f6tigt.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">das F\u00fcnkchen Schicksal<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">das F\u00fcnkchen Gottesf\u00fchrung, <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">das mich zum fliegen bringt.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Hoffentlich<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Was stresst dich und warum?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":695,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[9],"tags":[13],"class_list":["post-638","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-adventskalender","tag-adventskalender"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.xn--advnx-ira.de\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/638","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.xn--advnx-ira.de\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.xn--advnx-ira.de\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.xn--advnx-ira.de\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.xn--advnx-ira.de\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=638"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/www.xn--advnx-ira.de\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/638\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":834,"href":"https:\/\/www.xn--advnx-ira.de\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/638\/revisions\/834"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.xn--advnx-ira.de\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/695"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.xn--advnx-ira.de\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=638"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.xn--advnx-ira.de\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=638"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.xn--advnx-ira.de\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=638"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}